Chili watch day 8: I must have had 15 dreams about New Mexico last night. They were all fine until the end where they started a downward spiral, one of which involved me seeing the removal of a penis. Maybe it was because we threw up a Netflix on Demand the other day called Train that is basically Hostel, but...on a train. Anyway, that removal was forced, the one in my dream was voluntary, and that really wasn't even any of the bad parts. It all started out like I was going to have everything I needed and be happy and safe. The need for safety may come from the Realtor that spoke for at least 10 minutes about safety in Baltimore because he sensed I was "concerned". The neighborhood we were in was comprised mostly of young professionals, Josh Lauren's much accommodating parents, and hipsters, and by the artwork that posed 8 nude men, chest-up, as mounted hunter's trophies, I am assuming a good portion of the gay community. So I wasn't really afraid of anything, seemed pretty safe, but maybe I should be more leery. Or maybe I still had that starry country-girl look in my eyes. In any case, a lot came rushing back to me at some point yesterday and it all spilled into my dreams, all night... when I wasn't lying awake. Maybe I just need a miracle...
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